Allow me to back up a bit. A few years ago, in looking for the perfect gift for a father who tends to fix his clothes with a glue-like product called "Shoo-Goo", I stumbled upon the Turducken. The Turducken had gained a bit of fame over the years because John Madden--football announcer and spit collector--gave away turkey legs to players for a job well done during the annual Thanksgiving day football game (Bears/Packers/Vikings/Cowboys/Bucs/Saints/Raiders/Patriots/Steelers/Redskins/Chargers/Seahawks 45 - Lions 3). The CBS production staff annually put together an avian-monstrosity called the "Turducken" that was a Frankenstein-type bird: a turkey combined with a chicken combined with a duck.
A bird is not supposed to have this many legs
Turns out, the tradition goes back much, much further than John Madden: “In his 1807 Almanach des Gourmands, gastronomist Grimod de La Reyniere presents his rôti sans pareil (‘roast without equal’)—a bustard stuffed with a turkey, a goose, a pheasant, a chicken, a duck, a guinea fowl, a teal, a woodcock, a partridge, a plover, a lapwing, a quail, a thrush, a lark, an ortolan bunting and a garden warbler—although he states that, since similar roasts were produced by ancient Romans, the rôti sans pareil was not entirely novel. The final bird is very small but large enough to hold just an olive.”
Thanks Wikipedia!
Today, a few companies produce the Turducken around Thanksgiving, although it's not nearly as fancy-schmancy as the one Grimod conjured. These days, the thing is pretty much just a de-boned chicken stuffed into a de-boned duck stuffed into a de-boned turkey, stuffed with a sausage and cornbread stuffing. I say it like that in itself is not awesome.
Needless to say, this gift was the highlight of my Dad's Christmas. Other than spending time with his family, of course (just kidding! The bird was totally the highlight).
Anyhoo, when writing my boring post about Thanksgiving 2011, I was going to include a picture and a history of the Turducken we devoured--the Turducken having now become a family tradition--but I was just too lazy to do so. Can you blame me? I still had a crap-load of Turducken in me. But in researching the Turducken, I came across a dessert so awesome, so ungodly...I...I just don't have the words.
Seriously, check this out. I present to you, my brave readership of nine, with the "Turducken of Desserts"...the "Cherpumple":
So...horny...
Dear god. That thing is amazing. It's a cherry pie baked into a frosted, white cake, placed on top of an apple pie baked into a yellow cake, atop a pumpkin pie baked into a spice cake. Click on the picture for a larger, more fantastical image.
Creator Charles Phoenix says, "It both intrigues and horrifies people."
Lisa, my work neighbor and resident badass chef (I want her to write a cookbook called "EAT THIS!" that features a picture of her on the cover scowling in a chefs hat, holding a mixing bowl and giving the reader the finger), thinks she can make one of these. She is, however, thinking that it should only be two layers. Heresy!
I dunno. I want one. Although, to be fair, I'm pretty sure we all now have diabetes merely from looking at the picture.
